


Klein X Reader: Weenie

by SheerIridescence



Category: Sword Art Online
Genre: F/M, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-29
Updated: 2014-12-29
Packaged: 2018-03-04 06:28:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2955746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheerIridescence/pseuds/SheerIridescence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just.... face time fun with Klein because he needs some lovins if yo get my drift.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Klein X Reader: Weenie

“Fuck this game. Fuck its creator. Fuck this grass. Fuck my life… AND FUCK THIS GOD DAMN FRENZY BOAR PIECE OF ASS!” You cursed loudly, fiercely slashing and one-hitting the monster with your black nodachi, shattering its form into thousands of shining shards.

You were just on the outskirts of a town that resided on one of the floors in the twenties, you being too lazy to give a flying fuck which floor it was or what town you were near, as your frustration with this game was getting to your head. It was your original intent to take a rest stop in a safe zone, but the hoard of those worthless monsters held you up, and for longer than you wanted because there were literally hundreds of those frenzy boars, followed up with a mix in of some dire wolves. At this point, even after these few weeks that have gone by, you were really starting to hate this game a hell of a lot more than most were. You weren’t driven to suicide, but you so regretted ever slipping on that Nerve Gear and getting trapped in this god forsaken place with no log out button and death threatening you at almost every corner.

“Christ. What were a bunch of those low level things doing up here in the twenties? It the creator TRYING to be an annoying prick?! I mean, weak mob setups? Seriously?” You grumbled, sheathing your nodachi back at your hip. “… Wow. I really am a bitchy person while I’m alone out here. I think my life as a solo player is getting to me… Man, I need a guild to straighten me out.” You sighed, shaking your head at yourself as you proceeded onward into the town you were previously aiming to take a break at before. “Maybe I’ll find one here. Yeah, I think it’s time I did the guild thing.”

With that new objective in mind, you strolled on through the town, pleased that it’s a safe zone to give you a long awaited break. There was a beautiful fountain sitting in the main plaza, which you easily reached via the straightforward paths, giving the place something pleasing to the eye to match with the relaxing sounds of dripping water that it emitted. Not that the rest of the world wasn’t incredibly beautiful though. You just found it hard to absorb in it when you were busy being a rage gamer and getting pissy about how you were stuck here constantly.

You stopped at the edge of the fountain and shoved a hand in your pocket past your armour, weight shifted to one leg as you stood and gazed at the spurting blue waters of the fountain, ever so slightly sending a light mist of its damp particles your way. Strangely, you found yourself hungry at that moment. Mob clearing must really make you famished. Pulling up your item menu, you scrolled through until you found a piece of bread that would suffice as a snack, selecting it and taking it into your free hand as a reward after that bullshit.

Only managing a single bite, some hasty yelling caught your attention from the opposite side of the fountain, like a fight was about to break out by the sounds of it. That wasn’t something you were too keen on happening; not with your small justice streak you had at least. Rolling your eyes, you let curiosity take you over as you walked around the fountain, shoving the last of the bread in your mouth and licking your fingers to finish for free hands. Now with a proper view of the situation, there looked to be one jerkish looking guy pissing off a small group of others, most likely a guild, clad in red, the leader standing up front and having red spiked hair with a similar coloured headband, accented with two diagonal yellow lines on one side. The group looked pissed, kinda like you today, only with deadly expressions to counteract the cocky one of the other. Looks like it was time for you to pull your usual instinctive liberator act to keep things at peace, game or not. Curse words were beginning to fly anyway, and things might get messy for them, other players, and even NPC’s

“Yo! What’s going on over here? I think villages should be peaceful, not violent.” You called out, drawing their attention to you.

“Eeh? Strangers shouldn’t stick their noses in other people’s business.” The jerkish looking guy said.

“Peace is my business. What’s the deal?” You persisted sternly with crossed arms.

The leader of the guild seemed appalled by a stranger’s help, and didn’t speak up, but one of his members though, did that for him, and with considerable gusto as well. “This prick stole half our cash and items! The fucker’s got a high pickpocket level!”

“Wait, thieving?” You questioned, perking up at the stealing part.

“Yes! Tell her boss! That asshole screwed us over!” The man fretted, looking over to the one with the headband.

There was a lack of focus or communication there for a bit. That or he was lagging out on the spot because there was no immediate response. The doof was staring at you blankly, not hearing his comrade speak the first time. With a few quick snaps of some fingers, he snapped out of his daze and back into reality with a shake of his head, now catching the question he supposedly missed.

“O-oh! Right! Yeah! That idiot over there snuck up behind us and looted blind! Half our stuff is missing, and so is our Cor!” The headbanded man explained.

“Hmm? Whatever are you talking about?” The jerkfaced player hummed, playing on fake innocence to mock the others.

You, on the other hand, despised people who played on like this, as you weren’t exactly fond of lies. Straightening yourself, you looked up at the player’s cursor which you hadn’t looked at before. It was orange.

“You shouldn’t lie when the truth is so obviously right in front of you for everyone to see.” You said darkly, staring him down. “You’re an orange player. I don’t take a liking to anyone whose cursor isn’t green. Give up what you took. Now.” You ordered.

The orange player just laughed at you. “And what are you gonna do, make me?! We’re in a safe zone! Good luck getting a scratch on me!” He cackled.

You smirked. “I don’t have to be outside one to scare the shit outta you.” Taking a glance over to the guild in red, you snapped your fingers for attention. “Yo. What me o get your stuff back? Say the word. The grant will make things easier.” You mumbled to them, locking eyes with their leader.

There was a pause on his part. Every other member nodded a frantic yes in agreement, but it wouldn’t count until the say so from the leader was made clear.

“I’ll make it quick so a large fight won’t break out. That’s why I popped up after all.” You added reassuringly. “If your group rushes in, the mess will be bigger than it needs to be.”

With a sigh of defeat from the task he could have carried out himself, even if It was a little rowdy, he gave a nod of approval. That was the snap of the metaphorical rope that gave you access by your own internal rule, a smirk spreading across your face.

“It’ll take less that fifteen seconds.” You chuckled, darting forward to the orange player’s position.

“HAH! What’s a chick like you gonna- HUAGH!”

The stranger tried to back talk you with his high and mighty confidence, but didn’t get too far when you stuck a fist to his gut, knocking him back into the edge of the fountain. You didn’t stop there though, and proceeded with rapid jabs at him using a small knife, making sure to hit in as many fatal areas as you possibly could, driving an unnerving feeling of fear through the thief’s body. Someone must’ve tampered with the pain settings outside though, because what he was feeling looked a little over kill, judging by his reactions to the cyber-net slash marks, even though he wasn’t receiving any damage. That, or he was just scared shitless by your accuracy and knowledge of where it hurts most. Just so you didn’t seem like a sick sadist though, you ceased and slipped your knife away, zipping behind him on the edge of the fountain and readying a hand up near his neck before speaking.

“Orange players are never safe when I’m in the same safe zone. You’re lucky you don’t lose any health.” You muttered, letting your hand dart forward and smack into a pressure point on his neck, causing him to choke before going limp and falling forward to the ground unconscious.

Upon his fall, you swiped all the stolen items and cash into your inventory, kicking aside the unconscious form while muttering about how you disgraced and player with an orange or red marker. Finishing you mumbling, you stepped up to the guild and pulled out your item menu, selecting all the items you picked up and transferring them over to them.

“All this is yours, correct?” You asked for confirmation.

“Yeah… Shit, thanks. If we would’ve had at it, it wouldn’t have been that quick, or as clean. We might’ve broken something, actually.” The leader admitted, selecting the ‘accept items’ option.

“I kinda figured. I like safe zones to stay safe, thanks.” You laughed dryly. “But, you’re welcome for that. Got it all back within the fifteen second mark I set. That’s technically a personal best.”

“Yeah, that was real gutsy of you to jump in there when you didn’t even know us.” He nodded.

“HEY MISS YOU SHOULD JOIN OUR GUILD!” One of the members randomly shouted.

The leader seemed to cringe in shock at the outburst. “You moron! She’s obviously a solo player! You think a gorgeous woman like that would join our fucking guild?!” He scolded, not watching the words that were coming out of his mouth.

“But she’s strong! We could-”

“QUIET.” The leader growled, almost embarrassed by the outburst.

“Gorgeous?”You thought. “Ah, so he’s one of those types of guys~! He better watch his mouth before he accidentally spills more of his thoughts.” You chuckled, a faint blush barely dusting your cheeks. “Well, uh, guys, believe it or not, I was actually just recently looking for a guild to join.” You spoke up.

“EEEH?!” Half the members shouted in surprise.

“Being a solo player is a bit lonely and… Well, I need someone to keep me in check.” You chuckled sheepishly. “I’m a bit of a rage gamer.”

“You- Really?” The leader asked with a dropped jaw. His subordinates were all probably cheering silently in their minds behind him, happy with your words.

“Yep! So, how does this sound instead of that outburst?” You started, clearing your throat. “May I join your guild? I need some support to calm my solo rage.”

He blinked, then sighed slightly with a small smile of defeat. A cute new member didn’t sound like a bad idea, especially since both sides agreed to the joining. “Alright. Seems I’m outmatched on both sides. You’re welcome to join our guild.”

“Sweeeeet~!” You hummed, happy with the acceptance.

“Welcome to Fuurinkazan. If you can tolerate idiots, you’ll fit right in.” He joked. “Name’s Klein.”

You laughed. “_______. Happy to become a member. I like a guild that gives free compliments.”

“Compliments…?” Klein asked, seemingly confused.

“Indeed. I rather enjoyed being called a ‘gorgeous solo player that wouldn’t want to join this guild.’” You smirked. “Nice first impression Klein.”

“Wait, I- oh. I-…” Klein stuttered dumbly, remembering his past words now with a tinge of blush on his face now.

You began to laugh. “Nice face. It’s cool though. I’ll take compliments from a cute guy any day~!” You teased before walking past him and in with the other members. “Exerting that bit of energy burned off that snack I had! Who’s up for some food?!” You exclaimed.

The group cheered, already liking you and your idea as they turned with you, heading to the nearest restaurant while high-fiving and introducing themselves to you, pleased with their new, strong, and humorous acquaintance. Klein gulped and shook his head, thinking on your words for a moment before he slapped his face a couple times to rid himself of the blush that had appeared, regretting his stupidity.

“Come on Klein! A cute girl just asked to join and you looked stupid! Careful what you say, moron!” He internally scolded himself, sighing as he picked up his feet and followed in step behind you and the others for some food.

“…She called you cute…”

“SHUT UP BRAIN!” He yelled out loud, growling at the returning blush with another shake of his head before anyone turned and noticed.

*~*~*~*~*Time Skip*~*~*~*~*

It’s been months since the theft incident back on that floor in the twenties. Since then, you’ve successfully grown stronger and become a full-fledged member of Fuurinkazan, your attire now matching the red colour scheme instead of your dark solo getup. It was definitely a good idea that you joined a guild. Clearing floors was ten times more fun, and a laughable conversation was always on hand, having you smiling a ton more than when you were alone. This was probably one of your best decisions you’ve ever made in this game; next to that eight course meal you had one night of course. But, you had grown surprisingly close to everyone, especially Klein, making you all ex-strangers now. And the closeness with Klein part, probably the most fun bit of your time with this guild ever. You just loved to bash on him and make jokes at him, constantly picking on him and getting a laugh out of the others at his flustered state. Isn’t there a saying that revolves around if you pick on someone a lot, it means you like them? Yeah that’s been tossed around by the others to you, nudging you at him after the first week or so, trying to get you together with whatever shitty excuse they could use to get you close. You’d slap them back with a flushed face, knowing how much you’ve grown on him, being the only girl in the guild after all. You’d have to threaten them a good punch to the face at times just to get them off your back, but they did so with snickers to mock you, only making your face a deeper red. Putting that aside, at present, you were now proudly marching through the 55th floor, headed off to the closest hotel for the night for a well-deserved rest after that phenomenal boss fight you partook in.

“Aah, I’m beat! Let’s hit up that place there. Looks pretty vacant for the night.” You noted, stretching your arms up in exhaustion. “Perfect. We can have it all to ourselves then.”

There was a nod and murmur of agreement amongst everyone as the guild lazily trudged on in through the gates of the village that had come into view, heading into the easily visible hotel that was close to the entrance and dropping down Cor at the front desk for the night.

“Hmm..? Hehey, is that a tavern~?” You sang in question, skipping across the lobby and through a small archway, right into the said tavern you were curious about, taking up a bar stool at the counter and going for a drink right away.

“Well, it looks like she found her reward for the night.” A member laughed, pointing at you with his thumb.

The others chuckled and made a decision to get some sleep later, as they were fairly fond of your idea for a drink tonight. They could rest later, as a celebratory drink had now gained top priority over anything else. With the trend picked up, everyone gathered around you, taking seats at the front and grabbing drinks, Klein taking his seat next to you and exchanging a smile of welcoming satisfaction with you before sipping at the small glass of brandy he was given, a small blush taking place on both of your cheeks.

“Cheers to _______ and Klein for that double hit kill!” A guild member announced, raising his glass in the air.

“KANPAI!” Everyone cheered, thrusting their glasses in the air as well.

The attention made your blush deepen slightly, as you still weren’t quite used to this kind of after battle attention. Trying to cover it, you turned your head down to face your drink as you sipped at it casually with a small smile.

“Nice moves guys! You two know EXACTLY when to switch out! You’re the perfect partners for each other! Coordinated and inseparable~!” A member said, leaning on the counter and wiggling his eyebrows at you while another came up and slapped both you and Klein on the back.

“Come on guys, shut up!” You sighed with a slightly embarrassed smile, bringing your head up. Pausing for a moment, you slowly began to realize that this was actually the perfect time for you to begin to take shots at Klein like you always did. It was just too easy now. “I mean, there’s no need to praise us like you are. We all know it was me here. This doof couldn’t have known when to switch unless I was there to tell him to!” You said, your attitude changing as you turned to Klein with a devious smirk.

Klein choked on his brandy and nearly coughed it up as he slammed the glass down, clearing his throat before giving you one of those looks. “Excuse me? All you? I’m pretty sure this ‘doof’ saved your unobservant ass from getting stabbed in the back while you weren’t looking!” He shot back, returning your smirk.

“Hearing the word ‘saved’ come from the mouth of someone who was screaming like a little bitch previously is pretty phenomenal.” You snickered.

The others had gathered around by now and closely watched, letting out low ooo’s at the war they knew would come.

“Oho are we gonna start another one of those?” Klein inquired, releasing his hand from his glass. “Bring it.”

“Indeed we are, sir screams-like-a-girl doof.” You grinned.

He scoffed. “Tch. And who taught you all the techniques you use now? I’m pretty sure that was me who gave you team fighting tips. Wouldn’t be boasting now if I didn’t.”

“Even so…” You started. “Nah, you’re right. I must be pretty inferior to have been taught by a WEENIE.”

Snickers were held in and Klein stared at you wide eyed, clearly taken aback by your statement with a dropped jaw, and a red face.

“Did you just-!” Klein began, but didn’t finish as he was unable to find a place to continue his sentence.

“Oh I’M sorry! I really shouldn’t call you something you don’t actually have~!” You finished, grinning as you got a real good kick out of it yourself.

The counter erupted with laughter, people falling back off their stools, pissing themselves laughing. Loud cheers and people belting ‘OOH’ was all to be heard aside from the laughter while Klein’s face flushed as red as his in-game hair.

“SHIIIIT! _______’s got them insult skillz!” Someone shouted.

“You- little SHIT!” Klein shouted, leaping from his stool at you, making you cease your counter-slapping laughter.

Using your oh so quick reflexes, you caught his hands with yours and pushed back, taking the both of you off your stools and locking you in a fighting stance. With equally distributed force on each other from both arms, palms locked in tension against each other, you pressed your forehead to Klein’s, a devious smirk playing on your lips.

“It might be me, or the game graphics are faltering, because your face is sooooo red~!” You teased. “Whatever happened to the compliments I got when I joined, Klein?”

“Fucking can it _______!” He growled, pressing his forehead back against yours with a stutter. “B-being observant now of all times, eh?”

The tension was just straining like a thread about to snap. Klein was losing yet another war of insults, and getting embarrassed right off the top too. That goofy bit of tension though, was about to be snapped, courtesy of the guild, of course.

“Ah, quit yer bickering and kiss already!” A member shouted.

“What?” You and Klein spoke at the same time, your expressions softening into confusion before slight realization.

Before you could even have a word of objection, someone came up behind you and gave a small shove, shifting you off balance and forcing you forward into an accidental kiss with Klein.

The bar’s laughter just got louder and incorporated loud wolf whistling and counter slapping while Klein’s face turned an impossible shade of red and your eyes widened, the tension in your arms leaving along with the strong grip you and him had on your palms.

Over the roaring laughter, Klein locked eyes with you and began to apologize profusely with his own for his friends as he began to back away in embarrassment, his grip lessening as he shifted back. But, you smirked, and let out a small chuckle which made him stop in question. Now, you had instead stepped forward towards him, taking your hands and gently lacing your fingers with his while you pulled instead of pushed, letting them drop down to chest height as you turned the kiss from an accident to a deliberate action.

He was dumbfounded, really, not at all seeing that as the outcome of the action. He always thought that your teasing and jokes were just a sign of friendship, and when his friends would do anything to try and nudge you together, he’d push them off with a blush and try to ignore them, for fear that you weren’t out for a romantic sort of relationship, and if it accidentally happened due to his friends, you would leave the guild and quit being friends. That was his main problem, but it looks like he was wrong about your thoughts after all. It was the pretty ones that were the hardest to get after all.

“Shit. She went for it after all. _______ actually did it! WOO!” A member cheered, snapping the rest out of their slightly shocked state of seeing you actually rake it and kiss back.

This seemed to further embarrass Klein as you felt his face heat up quite a bit. After feeling like you’ve embarrassed the poor man enough, you pulled back, fingers still entwined with his.

“You really are a weenie. You blush way more than I do!” You giggled, squeezing his hands slightly.

“Would you just-! Mmmh.” He groaned in protest, looking away with his still heated face.

“That’s alright though. I’m into weenies. Especially ones that accidentally let slip their inner thoughts and… compliments~.” You said with a smile. “I probably should’ve told you before someone did that though… But it works~!”

He gulped and sighed, before trying to bring back the witty conversation from before. “Were you scared, or what?”

You snorted. “A fuck of a lot less than you were, ya chicken shit.”

He cringed in defeat. “Well you got me there…” He admitted. “But you know… It’s the gorgeous ones that are hard to get. And I thought you were… Limited.”

“I’m the only chick in a guild full of guys. You think I can last that long without SOME sort of attraction?” You laughed. “Mm, and nice one, bringing back the old compliments. That’s more like it~!”

“Why you-… cheeky little shit.” He commented, looking down and shaking his head.

“But that’s okay, riiight? You love cheeky little shits” You grinned.

“You’re so lucky that… that I do.” He huffed with an almost unseeable smile.

“Yess~! I knew you did~!” You hummed in victory. “Mmm, hey Klein, I have a request though…”

“Oh? What would that be then?” He inquired.

“When we, or someone else beats this damn game, do you wanna… carry this on outside in the real world?” You asked, blush taking its turn on your cheeks now.

Klein chuckled and released his fingers from yours and replaced his hands at your waist.

“How’s fuck yes for an answer, you little shit?” He answered.

“A perfect answer, fucking weenie.” You nodded, moving your hands up around his neck, pulling down on him again to lock lips once more, tilting your head with his to achieve angles you were both hesitant to before.

Quickly though, he pulled back for a moment to speak. “Hey _______, about your comment on calling me a weenie… Whether it’s in game, or ‘out of this world,’” He paused to wink. “Would you care to have me prove your statement wrong one night~?” He finished with a hum.

It was your turn to have your blush pick up to the shade of his hair now, as you averted your eyes to the side. “K-Klein, you’re such a- … I-I don’t know!” You said in a hushed whisper, inwardly cursing at yourself for being unable to find a smart assed remark like before.

“Can’t think of anything?” He chuckled. “You will soon.”

“I-Idiot!” You scolded, bashing his shoulder with your fist before making him close the gap once again, leaving you two to kiss with all the embarrassment and with all the hilarity you’ve shared up until now. Definitely no regrets in ever joining this guild.

This was definitely more than just a stupid game to you now. Though, if only you could get rid of those howling idiots just behind you…

**Author's Note:**

> Well.... first time on archive.... just kinda... imported myself over here from DeviantART..... yeah....
> 
> don't... hurt me. Please.
> 
> begentle.


End file.
